It's Not All Sunshine and Rainbows

There's something about weddings that brings out the drama. Maybe it's the pressure of a "once in a lifetime" experience, the shock of laying out so much cash, the challenges of personalizing an occasion so steeped in tradition or the intricacies of blending two families together while you and your fiance are creating a new one. Planning a wedding is stressful! I heard this and thought I have nothing to worry about: I'm a calm and super-organized person with supportive friends and family. Now that I'm in the trenches I know it's true. No matter how well you anticipate, your wedding resides smack dab in the middle of the real world with real people. And that means conflict. And that means stress.

A huge part of the stress for me is that everyone is looking to us for decisions about the day. At first, it was fun to research possibilities and interview vendors before discussing together and booking. Now I have serious decision fatigue. All of our major items are booked, however this leaves little items like the card box, guest book, programs and favours that I just can't put as much effort into anymore!

 

Hopefully your wedding is a joyous time and you're surrounded by caring friends and family. Know this: not everyone is thrilled about who you've invited, what they need to wear or how the day will unfold. And sadly, some of them will tell you. J and I have carefully planned the wedding as a reflection of our personalities and I know it's our day and we shouldn't let other people trample our dreams, but it's hurtful when your friends and family are negative and to me it's a fine line between standing firm and becoming the dreaded bridezilla.  

Here are some tips to help you with the stress and/or drama:

1. Communicate - provide clear directions and try to be as specific as possible when discussing ideas so that everyone is on the same page and knows what's expected of them. Pictures are great for dealing with vendors to avoid any misunderstandings and really make meetings go quickly and smoothly.

2. Deligate - don't be a hero! If people want to help and feel included in your wedding let them. This is tough for a control freak like myself but I'm so lucky to have amazing bridesmaids who have volunteered to help me with so much wedding stuff. And I'm really looking forward to handing off responsibilites to our Day of Coordinator for most of the last month.

3. Take care of yourself - take time for youself to enjoy non-wedding activities, eat plenty of antioxidants to combat stress and don't skimp on sleep! I'm taking Omega 3 fish oil supplements to help with stress and I'm tackling the one hundred push up program for exercise and much-needed arm toning.

4. Let it Go -  Once you've made a decision you're happy with, stop looking at other ideas! Put down the bridal magazines and step away from the blogosphere to save yourself the headache of second-guessing and last-minute changes.


5. Eyes on the Prize - At the end of it all, you'll be married to a great person and nothing else matters. Really!